Somewhere in the Middle
Here we are, once again,
somewhere in the middle:
between the already and the not yet,
between what is and what’s to come.

Emmanuel,
God With Us,
be with us now -
in the waiting and the longing,
the hoping and the praying,
the singing and the silence.

All our little wants loom large as we wait.
The pleasures of “more”
tickle our taste buds
and candy our conscience.

We say you alone are enough,
but how quickly
we are bent right back
toward ourselves -
looking downward,
limping and listing
toward the next best thing.

In this temporary and necessary now,
deliver us from the tyranny of our fancy Pharaohs,
and the bondage of our shiny shackles.

We were living in Flagstaff, Arizona. On this particularly clear night, as the moon hung full and bright in the star-filled sky, I was driving my son home from the church building. This was a time in his early development when I would’ve been answering lots of “why” questions. I wasn’t expecting this.

“Daddy, why is the moon so far away?”“I don’t know. Maybe someday you’ll be able to answer that question for me.”(Quietly staring out the window before reaching out his hand) “I just want to touch it.”

As we continued to drive home, I asked God to give me that same curious and courageous spirit - to not only ask questions, but to reach out and grab hold of God. “Why are you so far away, God?” “I just want to touch you.” I wonder how God responded to my question that night. Did God delight in my curious and courageous spirit?

Likewise, I wonder how God responded when the psalmist asked, “Why do the nations conspire, and the peoples plot in vain?” (Psalm 2:1)

It was a great question.

Psalm 2 would’ve served as a royal song highlighting the reign of King David and his heirs. The worshippers would regularly remind themselves that their God, YHWH, was in heaven laughing at such folly. Who in their right mind would think that they could “out-God” God? Their King, after all, was the one of whom the LORD declared, “You are my son; today I have begotten you.” (v.7) What a pointless endeavor to walk, stand, and sit in the seat of scoffers (Psalm 1), or to heed the counsel of fools!

As great questions usually do, this one kept the conversation going far into the future. The early church, in the midst of persecution, appropriated this same Psalm as a testimony to the sonship of Jesus, the Messiah.

As I turn the calendar to December, the page is light but my heart is heavy. Just yesterday my oldest son was sent to Europe for a lengthy deployment with the Army. He left early in the morning after recording a short goodbye video for his wife and two little girls, who are very sad, indeed. They are now in a season of waiting. And so am I.

How long will we have to wait to hear how he’s doing? How long will he be gone? All we have are questions. All we can do is wait for the arrival of a phone call, a message, a sign that he’s safely arrived and is settled enough to reach out to his loved ones.

I’m beginning this month with, not only a heaviness, but a clear invitation from God. I feel a burning in my bones to start writing - to try and put words to my own longing, and to be a source of encouragement for others who are “in the waiting.” My prayer is that the people who need these words of encouragement will find them and receive them.

Advent means “arrival.” The season of Advent is, in fact, a season of waiting for the arrival of the child to be born who is called “Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:16). With this annual rhythm of Thanksgiving behind us and Christmas just ahead, we have once again entered a season of hopeful anticipation that the “arrival” of the Jesus, “the Light of world,” will finally and fully break through the darkness with “peace on earth and goodwill for all.”

What does our waiting look like? May I suggest the image of a tree? Not just any tree, but a really healthy, full tree, with leaves that never wither and fruit that never ceases to grow.

Psalm One is one of my favorite texts in all of scripture because it images what healthy connection to God really looks like.

“Oh, the joys of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinners, or join in with mockers. But they delight in the law of the LORD, meditating on it day and night. They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do.” (Psalm 1:1-3 NLT)

The picture we get is of a person who develops their relationship with God in such dependency and trust that they are not swayed by any other offer of soul satisfaction. Here’s how one writer puts it:

“What do you give your attention to? What do you immerse yourself in? What do you take pleasure in? Where do you take your life cues from?” (The Life With God Bible, Renovaré)